This skit could be used to announce most any occasion, but for obvious reasons, it lends itself best for promotion of a church work day or a men's fellowship event. Six people are needed: (Four TEAM MEMBERS [TM]s and one TEAM LEADER [TL] to direct the maneuvers. One OFF-STAGE PERSON is also needed for the final climax). Two TEAM MEMBERS and one TEAM LEADER could be used in a pinch (also with one OFF- STAGE PERSON, of course).

Props:

(1 for each TEAM MEMBER, unless otherwise noted)

Tool belts. Electrical Drills Large drill bits with rubber hose "sleeves" installed over them for safety (allow an extra 1/4" to 1/2" to extend beyond the end of the drill bit for an extra safety factor. 50 to 100 foot extension cords Fourplex electrical box, with cord (optional) Large tape measures Hammers (optional and preferably Toy-type rubber hammers for safety) Whistle (with lanyard) (the only prop needed for the TEAM LEADER)

Costumes:

Ball Caps.... Worn backwards of course (for those of you under 20 years old.. "backwards" means the bill is on the back of your head ;') Sunglasses (preferably opaque) Workboots Plaid shirts T-shirts and denim jeans bandannas (red preferably, and worn hanging out of back pockets)

Set-Up:

The tool-belts are around each of the four TEAM MEMBERS waists and the electric drills are in the belts with the extension cords attached so that the drills may be operated normally. The extension cords are all plugged in at one central (it helps to use the optional fourplex box) hidden location, where the OFF-STAGE PERSON is stationed. He must be able to see the action of the team, and control the extension cords. Tape Measures and optional hammers are installed on the belts for additional comic effect.

Skit:

A whistle blast is heard from the back of the church. All turn back to see... Five men (including TEAM LEADER) marching down the aisle to the front of the church, all the while the TEAM MEMBERS are dragging their extension cords behind them. Part of the fun involves the extension cords, as they are avoided (or not!) while the TEAM goes through its maneuvers. The OFF-STAGE PERSON can help manage the movements of the cords, by keeping them taut or loose as needed.

When they all reach the platform the TEAM LEADER (TL) takes his place at the Podium (or center stage) as the TEAM MEMBERS (TMs) maneuver around him.

Maneuvers are as follows (directed by the whistles or Voice commands and hand gestures of the TL):

NOTE: Throughout all of the moves, regardless of the actions of the various actors (including those of the HAPLESS TEAM MEMBER), a strict deadpan look on all are needed. This "military" bearing makes the final climax that much more amusing.

NOTE: All HAPLESS TEAM MEMBER actions are optional.

#1 Tape Measures: TMs line up across stage two on each side with TL in middle. On command, TMs pull tape up to eyes in a salute and then put them back. They turn and face each other, perform same salute, putting them back. At any point, HAPLESS TM could get his finger caught on return, and quickly put his finger in his mouth (it stings!). Next, the outside men, do an about face, march back two steps, turn and step behind the middle two TMs and stand at attention. On command the ones in front smartly snap their tapes out full arms length to stage left and stage right respectively while the back men snap theirs arms length to middle. Alternate these moves. The front two then turn to step to outside positions while the men in the back step up to the front. The TMs to left, snap their tapes to left at the 11 o'clock position as the TMs to the right snap their tape to the right at the 1 o'clock position. They then snap the tapes back and forth to the beat of the whistle and then get carried away and start doing the old Saturday Night Fever disco moves! Then pandemonium reigns and the two inside start making air guitar moves (tape is the guitar neck) while the outside guys continue disco moves. Continue as audience laughter builds (air guitar guys doing "power chords" and "Chuck Berry-esque duck walks") until the TL "realizes" what is happening and puts them back in line with a series of preemptive blasts on his whistle.

#2 Optional "Hammer" moves: After this craziness, the audience will not be expecting the team leader to do anything funny (little do they know!). The TMS line up closer to each other, so that the hammers can "clear" each other.The team leader should blow the whistle with a pre- determined set of blasts, whereupon, all the TMs bring out their hammers. After taking them out the outside TMs swing their hammers in a complete circle missing the heads of the TMs in the middle.(They squat down, while barking out "Hup!") Now repeat this move with the inside two narrowly missing the outside TMs. (Carefully practice these moves, blood is never funny. If you can, use toy rubber hammers.... these are probably funnier anyway). The last move has the TMs going into a Rap style "gangsta" pose with arms crossed, after having pulled off this great and dangerous maneuver. They all look proudly at the TL for his approval. Now is the time for the TL to get his big laugh. The TL calls out "Hammertime" and does his best impression of "the Hammer" dance moves... and the TMs look at him with such disdain and thumb pointing (get him, he ain't hip at all), until he stops, disgraced. The TL looks embarrassed and blows his whistle with authority, and the TMs come back to attention with the hammers back in their belts, properly chastened. (As an alternative, HAPLESS could do the moves and get put back in line by the always serious TL) Note: If you are not sure of what this "Hammertime" stuff even means, you are probably too young and shouldn't even attempt this. Of course if you are of the **never**, **ever** **dance**, persuasion, you probably don't like this suggestion anyway, so sorry I brought it up! :) Besides, references to popular culture that are only a few years old can come off as stale, unless you do the moves pretty well (Rationalization :). If you can pull it off though, this bit of business can come off as extremely funny. You are on your own !!.....

Alternative ending to Hammer bit: If you wanted to still use the hammers, but nobody wants to do the "Hammertime" bit, you could have the inside TMs move closer to the TL, and rotate outward at the same time missing the outside guys and then continue the arc, rotating inward; and narrowly miss the back of the TL's head the first time (he drops his whistle) and then rotating back again hit him in the nose (or stop inches from it). He pushes the offending arms down, and the hammers are returned to their loops on the belts. This is an old clown bit of business that should work well here.

#3 Bandanna moves: Members line up across stage facing audience with the TEAM LEADER in the middle. Whistle is blown and all TEAM MEMBERS turn their backs on the audience with a military precision, presenting their bandannas to the audience to nice effect. TMs Pull out bandannas to wipe brows, all in one motion. Replace bandannas in same pocket. HAPLESS TM can't find pocket. Puts his in tool belt. Another whistle and they complete the turn with same precision. HAPLESS could get wrapped up in his extension cord as the others neatly step over theirs.

#4 Building to the Climax of the Skit...... The TMs are lined up across the stage. The TL calls "Present Arms). Out come the drills with their extension cords attached and the rubber tips on the drill bits firmly in place.The TL steps back. the TMs in the middle step back three paces, turn and step behind the outside TMs. Holding the drills up and with them spinning, they march forward, the whistle blows, they turn right, march two paces and turn right again , repeating the moves until they are facing forward again. The whistle blows again, and all repeat the last maneuver, this time turning left each time. Now the TL starts blowing his whistle again, as HAPLESS (anybody) messes up causing some of the TMs to get confused. The TL blows his whistle repeatedly to get those guys straightened up, unknowingly causing the others to mess up as well, until all 4 are heading straight toward the TL, with their drills ready to "Run him Through". The TL covers his eyes and blows his whistle a long blast as the TMs advance upon him..... but nothing works. The drills are turning noisily, and the extension cords are getting tight..... certain doom for our hero......

#5 The Exciting Finish.... As the drills are inches away, and the TMs close in around him, the OFF-STAGE PERSON pulls all four extension cords out of the fourplex box (or its cord out off the wall), and the TL is saved. Out comes HIS bandanna and he mops his brow... Crisis Averted! (As an alternative, one TL pulled his right index finger across his forehead, and then shook it downward once, as if to shake off one drop of sweat. This is a very economical gesture and got a very big laugh.... its up to you!) They all march grandly off (Hupping, all the way), while the next person (chairman, etc. of the event) to come to the podium makes this announcement. "Don't be BORED (...EMPHASIZE BORED! Its a pun.... Get it?!) this _____(weekend, Friday, etc.)___. Come to ___________(the work day, etc.)".

NOTE: As a final LAUGH PAYOFF, have your pastor, song leader, etc. thank the DRILL TEAM for their hard work (Get it? *DRILL* team). Make sure they emphasize the word DRILL and wait for the laugh... (or groan) as the audience notes the pun.

This skit may seem tougher than it is. If practiced well, it is a sure winner, and even if some of the TMs get a little crossed up, the audience will enjoy the little fluffs here and there. Also, if it seems too complicated, try using the last maneuver, and leave out all the rest. Or mix and match, or make up your own stuff. It will still retain most of its power, and should still get the job done... (Get it? ...POWER......JOB done.... Awww never mind!) Have fun with it!

Interlight Main | Skit #1 | Skit #2 | Skit #3 | Skit #4